Necessary and Functionality Cookies should be enabled at all times so that we can save your preferences for cookie settings. A lot of it depends on the situation, but these tips will help you say something nice without setting her on edge. There’s also a rule we’re all told about guys. Even if she reacts negatively, that’s fine. For example, you can say, “Thank you. It may be more appropriate when someone is complimenting your personality or personal characteristics. We’d suggest doing this in private, even if the conversation the ‘compliment’ occurs in is public. By thanking them in this way, you’re also showing that you’re grateful that they pay enough attention to you to notice. Was it helpful, informative, or well-written? Keeping these cookies enabled helps us to improve our website and provide better resources. ps… Don’t forget that you also want to learn how to give compliments well! And getting one sometimes sets off the creep alarms because guys who are just looking to pick up and get laid aren’t always going to pay close enough attention to a woman to give her anything other than generic compliments. Analytics cookies: these cookies are used to track the use and performance of our website, email communications, and services, as indicated above. It invites comparison of DNA. After receiving a compliment, you can mention what you plan to do going forward. Yes, accepting a compliment can be more challenging than it sounds. Not every compliment goes anywhere, and that’s fine. A good way to deal with this is to mention how you feel. By including them and their personality traits into your response, you’re letting them know that they matter to you beyond simply enjoying their praise. Remember, she’s being paid to be there. This website uses Google Analytics and Facebook to collect anonymous information, such as the number of visitors to the site, the most popular pages, how users find my website, and how they move through the website. A compliment about physical appearance can be just as uncomfortable for the receiver for the same reasons you mentioned. You could also suggest meeting in the future. However, what happens if it was just a simple compliment about their excellent cooking, or amazing taste in luggage? Hey there – I’m Kim and I’m an accent and communication coach for non-native English speakers. Imagine this situation: For the past couple of weeks, you have been working on a major presentation to give to senior members of your department along with your colleagues. Here are some common expressions for questioning compliments: A better strategy for receiving compliments is to shift or share the credit. In some cases, sure, but it’s usually a big misstep. Understanding how compliments are received will help you decipher what’s going on! Maybe you can be a little more forward. So, make sure your compliments are super appropriate, don’t give them too frequently, and back off if she seems at all like she’s not into it or faking a smile. All Rights Reserved | Contact Us | Privacy Policy, How To Accept A Compliment: 8 Of The Best Ways To Respond, 20 Things A Guy Might Mean When He Calls You ‘Beautiful’ Or ‘Cute’, 9 Signs A Guy Likes You But Is Scared To Admit It, How To Encourage Someone To Believe In Themselves And Their Dreams. Now the meeting is over and people are moving on with their days. Guidelines for Receiving and Accepting Compliments. Saying that you ‘love’ that they’ve complimented you isn’t vain – it’s essentially putting the praise back on them without deflecting it yourself. It can be awkward when you respond back with a compliment (“No, your hair looks great!”), but it can also feel a bit weird when you’re standing there unsure of how to respond without being big-headed (“You’re right, my hair does look great!”). Find out more information about how I use cookies and other personal information in the Privacy Policy. Hi there, Thank you so much for your great post. It is good practice to acknowledge your investment of time and energy into a project or your hard work developing your skills. If someone says something positive about your work, you can tell them that their support has helped you want to keep pushing through with the project. If he’s nice to you but a jerk to others, he’s still a jerk. Please enable Strictly Necessary Cookies first so that we can save your preferences! You can say, “I really appreciate that coming from you. Rather than someone tell you your hair looks good, they might mention that it looks great in the new style you’ve had done. You can say, “Thanks a lot! Being polite to you might even be part of her job. Don’t second-guess people’s motives, believe in the positive things people say to/about you, and don’t be afraid to start giving out more compliments yourself. You’re not owed a compliment. And if you’re her supervisor, her boss, or anyone with any authority over her, keep the compliments professional in nature. The data from this comment form will only be used to respond to your comment. Compliments are meant to elevate people, and that’s all yours should be doing. And yeah, it’s also a way to test the waters and see how interested they are in you. You may also like (article continues below): As mentioned above, it’s tricky to navigate personal compliments without standing in the limelight and feeling a bit narcissistic. If you want to clearly communicate your meaning, finally speak with natural stress and intonation, and improve your accent so that people can understand you easily, you’re in the right place! You want to be able to spread the love, not keep it all buttoned up and tucked away. Chances are you will come off as insensitive or lacking humility and you will eventually say it to the wrong person, someone who is really struggling from something they also inherited. There are plenty of people who love and respect you and genuinely want to make you feel good. For example, you definitely shouldn’t tell someone at work or someone you don’t really know that they look beautiful. We can all use more compliments, but it’s important to do it right. These cookies don’t collect any personal information. But when you’re just meeting someone or still getting to know her, saying nice things about her physical appearance isn’t always the right move. © Copyright A Conscious Rethink. It’s not an exchange. Functionality cookies: these cookies provide functionality that makes using our service more convenient and makes providing more personalized features possible. It’s easy to laugh things off in a group, but a one-on-one discussion will make them feel a bit awkward and guilty – and less likely to do it again. Why would they avoid accepting the compliment? For someone else, it could be her cool shoes or a cute turn of phrase she uses. Common expressions used to avoid or minimize compliments are the following: Similar to avoiding or minimizing compliments, some people may question or doubt the compliment they received. Thanks. This is slightly better than avoiding compliments, but it is a strategy I rarely suggest using. “Thanks. It’s hard to believe, but it’s actually common in American English to completely avoid or otherwise minimize a compliment one or two times out of modesty. With so many genetic illnesses going around, just stick your toe out of this one. I got it in New York. If you know the person giving you a compliment, and you value their feedback because of their own special skills, talents, or sense of style, be sure to emphasize that their opinion is important to you. While the compliment may be intended as warm, it points out a physical characteristic that the person did not choose. I value your compliment so I am going to accept it graciously without an awkward and false self-deprecating comment that is very much related to eugenics. For example, they might remember your name and email in comment forms so you don’t have to re-enter this information next time when commenting. And if you’re having trouble figuring out if the thing you want to say is okay, remember that you don’t have to say anything if you’re not sure. If you went in with some expectations, you might feel insulted if she doesn’t give you anything in return. If someone tells you that you have an excellent attitude, you can compliment their dedication, passion, or energy: “Thanks! Putting down other people with your compliment is basically you being crappy to the waitstaff. I couldn’t have done it without you / the rest of the team / the support. So, run the compliment through your head before saying it out loud. How is she going to respond to it? There is no more attractive quality than humility. I can recommend this great book on it. Similarly, younger people who are still developing self-confidence may not believe what you are telling them. Sarah and Joe helped a lot. My win is a result of long hours of practice!”. She can’t just up and leave. I admire your dedication to your work!”. Show that you learned how to accept compliments by using one of the guidelines in a comment below. If someone compliments your taste in watches, you can start talking more about watches or places to buy them. Look at it this way. And that can open up more conversation — like telling you the story behind her tattoo or asking about yours — instead of just hitting a dead end. Try saying, “Thank you. Sometimes there’s just no need to overthink it. “Good genes” is a potential response that acknowledges that. Another good one for those meaningful moments. Someone is saying something nice about you so it should feel good, right? I appreciate that. Digging for compliments and fishing for compliments are expressions we use to describe someone who wants to hear people say more nice things about them, and it’s pretty obvious when the person is doing it! She could just thank you, but that doesn’t give her a chance to keep the conversation moving. Who knew receiving compliments could get so involved? Someone may say something that seems sweet enough on the surface but feels like a bit of an insult or a dig. Guys can read sexualized compliments as flirty and fun or as an indication that the night is going in the direction they want it to. This information is collected anonymously and we cannot identify you personally from this information.
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